Perfect
by Spike'sSavior
Summary: Sighing Spike closed his eyes and tried to remember back to when Angelus was actually proud of his youngest childe.


i own nothing please review. Angel didn't take over WolfRam and Hart otay...otay. please review. Used Simple Plan's 'Perfect' just in case you're wondering.

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_**Perfect**_

_**Hey dad look at me  
Think back and talk to me  
Did I grow up according to plan?  
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?  
But it hurts when you disapprove all along**_

Spike sat on Angel's desk listening to his sire scream at him about how much Spike screwed up all the time.

It was the same thing everyday, the same speech about how much an idiot he was.

Sighing Spike closed his eyes and tried to remember back to when Angelus was actually proud of his youngest childe.

_**And now I try hard to make it  
I just want to make you proud  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
I can't pretend that  
I'm alright  
And you can't change me**_

"_Good job Will" Angelus said as he patted the fledge on the back._

"_Thanks" Spike said as he reached down and pulled the spike out of the man's head._

"_Come Will let's go home" Angelus said_

_Spike smiled and followed his sire back to the mansion they were staying at._

"_You smell of blood, did you have a good hunt" Darla asked as she approached the two men._

"_Actually Will had a good hunt, caught five people in an alley way and killed the lot of them" Angelus said proudly._

_**'Cuz we lost it all  
Nothing lasts forever  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect  
Now it's just too late and  
We can't go back  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect  
**_

Spike sighed and wondered how Angelus could have changed so much. He was like the father Spike never had. Angelus was Spike's hero, the older vampire could do anything and he would die to protect his family members.

Now everything was different, Angel had come in place of Angelus and instead of being happy and proud of Spike he had become the villain who screamed and hurt his childe.

Spike was knocked out of his memory when he heard Angel say "You're such a failure as a childe."

Angel continued to scream and rant but Spike couldn't hear him. That sentence rang in his head over and over again, and shook him to his inner core while his soul shuddered and went cold for a minute.

_**I try not to think  
About the pain I feel inside  
Did you know you used to be my hero?  
All the days you spent with me  
Now seem so far away  
And it feels like you don't care anymore**_

Slowly the younger vampire got up and left the office and went up to his room in the Hyperion as Gunn, Connor, Cordelia, Fred, and Wes looked at him in sadness.

Quickly gathering his things he shoved them into his duffle bag. Dark clothes, dark eyeliner, Angry and Depressing CDs, a CD player and a black electric guitar, all things that reflected his life.

_**And now I try hard to make it  
I just want to make you proud  
I'm never gonna be good enough for you  
I can't stand another fight  
And nothing's alright  
**_

Putting a tape into the radio he pressed play and smiled when he heard 'Fall to Pieces' by Velvet Revolver. He turned it up as loud as it would go and grabbed a black sharpie.

He quickly wrote the lyrics to Simple Plan's 'Perfect' on all four walls of the room.

_**'Cuz we lost it all  
Nothing lasts forever  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect  
Now it's just too late and  
We can't go back  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect**_

Spike angrily opened the door and was glad to see he made a hole in the white wall. Unsheathing his favorite knife that Angelus had given him he stuck it into the door and for the last time read the inscribed Latin 'I'll always be proud of you'.

Before grabbing his bags Spike wrote 'I'm sorry I can't be perfect' in large angry letters on the door.

_**Nothing's gonna change the things that you said  
Nothing's gonna make this right again  
Please don't turn your back  
I can't believe it's hard  
Just to talk to you  
But you don't understand**_

Grabbing his bags and guitar case, Spike went downstairs to try and talk to his sire before he left.

But Angel was still in his office with his back turned talking to Wes and Gunn about getting Spike to go on a mission to get Spike killed.

Spike couldn't believe it he wanted to try and talk things out and Angel was going to kill him.

'Where did my hero go' Spike thought as tears threatened to spill over.

Grabbing his bags Spike left the Hyperion and threw his things angrily into the trunk of his Mustang. So he left California hoping that some day his sire Angelus would come back and find him as silent tears rolled down his face.

_**'Cuz we lost it all  
Nothing lasts forever  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect  
Now it's just too late and  
We can't go back  
I'm sorry  
I can't be perfect**_

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PLease review.

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